Saphhous

I used to think it was strange to wear flip-flops when it was still cold enough to wear a sweatshirt. But now, after endless months of winter, I understand.

My country feet yearn to break from the confines of fur-lined boots. They yearn to touch the soft, new grass; to wiggle my toes in the mud. But here, after endless months of winter, the ice is just beginning to melt. There is no grass, there is no mud.

At home, even when it snows, the grass struggles valiantly to poke out above the white wilderness, like a periscope above the artic ice. It springs back with spring – a rapid rebirth. But here, after endless months of winter, the grass has not grown back.

I used to think it was strange for the grass to always be green when it was still cold enough to wear a sweatshirt. But now, after endless months of winter, I understand.

I wrote "I love you"

(to myself) the other day.

The words just–look–happy.

     it's,hard,to

                 see

them and; notsmile

...

   even,if,you're

crying.

Church bells.

       roof tops.

snow falls in flurries, flurries,

              whippingbyandswirlingby

with the wind.

posted for Dan, in appreciation.

For all you Mac kids, I'd like to recommend HotApp, an application that allows you to assign all sorts of good stuff to your function keys. (F1-F12 or so) Like URL's — I have it set up to where F1 takes me from the finder, or any other application, to the NYT Web site, et cetera.

It's great, because before this application, I had a row of lifeless, useless keys. Now I'm trying to figure out what to use them all for ...

good day

I've always wanted a boyf who liked to call me in the morning ... like on his way to work. This morning, in the shower, I lamented my lack of such a boyfriend. Then, an hour later, Jacob calls. Turns out he was working 12-8, not 10:30-4:30.

How sweet. I don't think it's possible for me to have a bad day now.

What Famous Leader Are You?"	What Classic Movie Are You?

go figure.

Kratkie

(Russian for "brief")

So, I'm laying in bed, reading Nabokov's The Eye. Suddenly, a fortune (from a cookie) falls out of the pages and onto my chest. It reads:

You will be traveling and coming into a fortune

How very strange. I am indeed traveling soon and a fortune would be quite wonderful.

I dare not question where the fortune came from. I'll consider it a gift and a blessing from my friends "upstairs" — the gods and goddesses I consort with through the guise of Wicca.

As above, so below. As within, so without. As the universe, so the soul. So mote it be and brightest blessings.

Exhale

I don't want to go home for the summer, because I don't want to live at my mom's, and there's not really room for me at my dad's. But I also can't find a job in Florida, not to mention I'm not sure if Jacob is okay with me spending the summer there. I'm feeling pretty stressed about the summer.

Something happened with my head last night, it was like my brain popped — I heard a weird noise then got really dizzy and couldn't see. There was some kind of flash and everything swirled around funny. Jacob said it sounds like glacoma, because the air builds up behind your eyes, and that's a really likely answer. It reminded me of what I think an aneurism would be like. Either way, it was weird.

Plus last week was pretty terrible — I had so much to do and so little time. I was really struggling. This week didn't look like it was going to be much better. But today it has all turned around.

I went to Russian Lit this morning, it was boring as hell. But when I got back, there was an e-mail in my inbox from the PR guy at Harvard, asking for more information about the story I want to do about Jesse "The Body" Ventura. It was a short e-mail, but since he didn't turn me down, I think there's a pretty good chance I'll be granted the interview. So then I had to e-mail the managing editor, who I had problems with all weekend, and see if he would want the story. (I thought I'd wait to see if the interview was a possibility before I brought it up, so it would have more weight.) He responded quickly and said definitely, and seemed excited about the idea and that I came up with it.

In between the e-mails, however, my Russian prof. gave back our big exams (the only one of the semester other than the final). I got a B. I was estatic. She even wrote "moladetz" on my test, which means excellent. Then I went to COM201, and we got our group PSA grades back — my group received an A. (So I have an A average in there, based on that and my news story, so I'm really happy. Especially since I got two B's and two C's last semester.) And Prof. Panich said I can use my Jesse Ventura interview for my profile assignment as well. In fact, she thought it would be great for me to use a real-life piece. (Haha. Should've done that for my news story.)

So that's the day. If I can just find a job in Orlando, get the interview, and get my parents to chill ... everything will be grand.

Thanks for reading this.

"Once it held laughter
Once it held dreams
Did they throw it away
Did they know what it means
Did someone's heart break
Or did someone do someone wrong?
So if you find someone
Someone to have, someone to hold
Don't trade it for silver
Don't trade it for gold"
Tom Waits: House where nobody lives

we love you, yes you.

cummingfirst.com. I promise this is way funnier than you think. And family-friendly.

How cool is this?

Belle de Jour: "A short, round man with overflowing plastic bags came up to me. 'Have you accepted Jesus as your Lord?' he asked. It sounded like reflex, devoid of meaning, as automatic as a 'hello.'

'Afraid not, Jewish,' I said. Stock answer. More a cultural than a religious thing for me, but usually sufficient to drive the crazies off.

He nodded in sympathy, his eyes never rising above the level of my shoulder. 'The Jews wanted a king, and God gave them a king, but he was manic depressive you see and would go out and hide in bushes screaming at people.'"

New blog I found. Supposedly written by a London call girl. I thought that part was funny, at least. I've got plenty of time tonight to read some more of her site.

"Disney's board on Monday rejected a $49 billion all-stock takeover bid by No. 1 cable company Comcast Corp. but said it would carefully consider any legitimate proposal."

Guess omie's job is still safe ...

An article about my favorite author.

"Beginning with Neuromancer in 1984 - the only novel ever to win sci-fi's Triple Crown of the Hugo, Nebula and Philip K. Dick awards - Gibson anticipated many concepts, such as cyberspace, that are now commonplace. The Washington Post called it 'an amazing virtuoso performance.'"

The Boston University Grading Policy

Result for the fight between tracy and jacob
I have too much time on my hands. I know the rest of you do too.

MacMinute: Prepaid iTunes Music Store cards now at Target
mmmm... iTMS ...

Snitch: Louie's liquors: "Uncle Pleasant's is the home of the Hip Ale, a combination of Hpnotiq Liqueur, Bacardi Razz and Kentucky's own Ale 8-1."
Ummmm ... Ale 8 ...

MacMerc.com: How to never lose Pepsi's iTunes giveaway

One of my friends posted a link to this on his blog. I thought it was particularly funny, since we've already figured out how to do it.

I know ...

It's late. But I'm not really tired. Nor do I feel like doing work. I'm excited about Joe Mag stuff (like the possibility of interviewing Jesse "The Body" Ventura!), but I don't really have anything I can work on. And I have some homework I could do, but I feel like I've done plenty of that for one day.

I really just wish jacob would call me.

new pics

Last night was my last with you — at least for a while. It was only the second night I've spent with you since I left last month.

Since you moved, you've been sleeping on that blow-up twin bed. It's not really big enough for two people, but I figured it would be fine — I'd be sleeping wrapped up in you regardless.

You woke up a few times last night because you bumped into me. It was at least twice, but maybe three times. You kissed me, several pecks each time. It was as if you had forgotten I was there — but you were extremely happy to find me beside you.

I woke up each time, too. The first time was cute, but the others were (in retrospect) spectacular — I hope you're always that happy to wake up to me.

And I hope you feel that way for a long time.

Taken from a free-writing session from today.

A movie!

Well, not really. It's really just an awful recording of Born Yesterday's last show. But I love it anyways.

Florida and valentine's day

Well, I finally got out of boston on a 7:05 a.m. direct Song flight to Tampa. Jacob whined about having to drive an hour to come get me, but whatever. The Song plane was really nice, too — leather seats with a television in all the headrests, and the televisions all had 25 satellite stations. (I watched HGTV and TLC the whole way down).

Jacob got me a hand-picked box of Godiva chocolates ... And he did a damn good job, too. There's an expresso one, a strawberry/white chocolate one, a key lime one ... Oh, and a giant box of rainbow nerds (probably my favorite candy ever) and a candle.

So right now it's almost 9 a.m. and we're getting ready to go to Sea World. Yay!

Florida!

I hope everyone at 11c has a great long weekend — try to avoid anyone getting sick or busted. I'll see you all on Monday!
I am going to florida. It's above 70 there. I can't wait. I have to make it through russian, then I can leave.

Geek code

Mine:

GCCd--(---)s-:--a---C+++U*
P+L+E--W++N+K-w---M++PS++PE--Y+PGP-t5
X+Rtv+b++++DI++D+ Ge++h-r+x+++++

Want one of your own? Want to know what mine means? Have a lot of free time? Go here.

Ugh.

My head hurts, I'm tired, I'm bored, I'm at work. Why isn't it Friday yet?

Song du jour

Come on up to the house:
"Well the moon is broken
And the sky is cracked
Come on up to the house
The only things that you can see
Is all that you lack
Come on up to the house"

iCal

I put my school schedule online too. Maybe I'll put up another calendar ... if I ever think of it. (Also, iCal users can subscribe to my calendar.)

School pics. If you live on my floor, you've probably seen all these before.

Apple

No matter how many times they tell me to "think different," I always want to think just like Apple. I signed up for a free trial of the .mac account. So I have a snifty photo album. More cool stuff to come.

Sad picture.

I know this dog looks like a bear, but look at how pretty its face is. I want a pet.

Today's song du jour:

"Heartattack and Vine," by Tom Waits. Lyrics here.

So mean!

I suppose it was "hate tracy" day. people said my hair was nice, but were really mean to me the rest of the time. zach just said I "always look bad," to which i replied that i hate him, and he said, "because i tell the truth?"

I feel very angry right now. Like crying angry. Why don't people like me? I try to just say whatever and not worry about it, but sometimes it hurts to think I'm somehow universally offensive.

Oh, and don't post replies just b/c you pity me — that'll just make me feel worse.

hair pic

Ta-da Not a great pic, but whatever.

Ol' 55

And now the sun's coming up,
I'm riding with Lady Luck,
freeway cars and trucks,
Stars beginning to fade,
and I lead the parade
Just a-wishing I'd stayed a little longer,
Oh, Lord, that the feeling's getting stronger.

I'm feeling very tom waits-y this week. I've also concluded I really don't like people. Some in particular, and all in general. I definitely think people are really inconsiderate sometimes.

A list!

And a wish list at that! Yay for fun goodies!

I want...

THIS. Now, it's up to you guys (and a gal or two) to let me know if i'm going to look like a damn fool running around on the warm, sandy Florida beaches in this.

Micromegas A must read. Really. One of my favorite stories. Read Candide, too, if you're really bored.

"sent an overnight e-mail message"
What the hell does that mean? The only way e-mail is "overnight" is if you send it through AOL's sluggish servers. Silly, silly copy editors.

Some in the technocamp imagine requiring a license to operate a computer, just like the one required to drive a car.

Southern Sweet Iced Tea: "Add the sugar and stir until the sugar is dissolved."

With recipe. See?!?

Boston.com / Travel / The hats... the stars... the betting... the scene...Ah, the Derby. And an article about it in the globe, at that.

Poynter Online - 1,000 Headlines in 460 Days: "After 1,000 headlines, one thing I've learned is that everyone secretly wants to write monkey headlines."

Cute article with a bunch of funny headlines. Sadly for several of you, you learned yesterday my affinity for headlines.

Cell phones and their use in journalism

Grrrr ... noise.

Ya know, the girl next door to me would probably have a much easier time getting up in the mornings if she didn't stay up late having what sound like mini-parties (shouting, laughing, loud music ...). Then she wouldn't hit her snooze alarm eight times every day. And I wouldn't have to listen to the parties, or the alarm.
Have you ever just wanted to strangle someone?

Hmmm ...

Why am I here again? I mean in the literal sense, not some metaphysical way.What was it that inspired me to come to college, to do something with my life other than work a menial job as a secretary or waitress or something?
Oh wait, I remember: life-long happiness. Guess I'll just have to stick it out.
Whew. That was a close one. I almost called McDonald's to see if they were hiring (substitue LEO for McDonald's if you're from kentucky).

On a more inspiring note, I saw a squirrel today. It was about a foot away from me, just looking up at me. It was nice. I miss the nature that was so constantly, unrelentlessly at hand in Kentucky.

Oh well.

Valentine's Day

I don't have any particularly good or bad valentine's day stories ... I've only had a boyfriend on valentine's day twice: once I got a really pretty ring from Thailand (which i later lost on the soccer field), and the other I got a bonsai tree. But I still like the holiday. It's fun. And there's so much candy. I said something to my dad in an e-mail about going to see jacob that weekend, and he said:

its is your job to get him anything but a card, that is
his job to get you something.

Into coherent English, I think it means: I'm only supposed to buy him a card, but he has to buy me something. The holiday is looking even better.

TV news gives plenty of speculation, little substance: "People who depend on TV news are among the least informed citizens, according to the Pew Research Center, which studies attitudes toward the press and politics"

Huh. Go figure.

Boston.com / Weather : "Today. Mostly sunny. Highs 35 to 40. Northwest winds around 10 mph this morning. Becoming light and variable."

Fuck you, Punxsutawney Phil. Oh, wait. I guess 40 degrees isn't quite spring time. But it sounds so warm.